


A Pad Full of Geese

by ReleasingmyInsanity



Category: The Monkees (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - The Soulmate Goose of Enforcement, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Food mention, Geese, Getting Together, Goose-typical violence, M/M, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-22
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-25 16:54:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20727587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReleasingmyInsanity/pseuds/ReleasingmyInsanity
Summary: In 1967 the world is descended upon by special geese. Geese who bring you to your soulmate. Unfortunately, the geese are angry.Join the Monkees as they attempt to handle a large assortment of angry geese and maybe find their soulmates along the way.





	1. Peter's Birthday

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [OMG, Goose Please!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9878333) by [Boxstorm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Boxstorm/pseuds/Boxstorm). 

Something very strange was happening in 1967. The number of goose attacks worldwide had skyrocketed. People were being attacked by geese left and right as the geese struggled to bring them to other people. Other people who were having their birthdays. Then the goose would refuse to let them leave until they had kissed.

The only explanation anyone could come up with was that the geese were introducing soulmates to each other. No one knew where the geese had come from, or how they knew people’s birthdays and soulmates. But somehow they did.

The four Monkees couldn’t help being a little nervous, as well as curious, as Peter’s birthday drew near. Would there be a goose? What would Peter’s soulmate be like? Was it someone he already knew? Did they have enough bandages on hand for goose attacks?

By the time Peter’s birthday arrived, they were all on edge. Hoping that they could get through the day without anyone being mauled by a goose. But there wasn’t much they could do but wait until a goose arrived with someone in tow. So they did their best to proceed like it was any other birthday, waking Peter up with presents and singing Happy Birthday to him.

As soon as they finished singing, almost as though the song was their cue, the bedroom was suddenly mobbed with three very angry geese. One headed directly for Micky, one for Davy, and the third for Mike.

“What are you chasing us for!?” Davy yelled over his shoulder at the goose that was after him as he jumped over a chair trying to get away.

“Shouldn’t they be chasing Peter’s soulmate instead of us!?” came from Mike.

“You really want to wish this off on some poor girl??” Micky shouted back.

“At this moment, yes!”

Peter stood in the middle of the room, confused and trying to figure out what to do. He thought through everything he knew about the geese. This didn’t make any sense, the other guys were right. These geese didn’t attack your friends. They only chased your soulmate.

Then it hit him. If the geese only chased your soulmate, and the geese on his birthday were chasing his friends…

“That’s it!”

“What’s it!?” the other three asked at the same time.

“You’re it. Micky, come here!”

Micky turned and headed towards Peter. The goose that was chasing him slowed down and stopped trying to hit him with its beak.

“Is it all right if I kiss you?” Peter asked.

Micky gave him a questioning look, but nodded. “Of course.”

Peter smiled, leaning in to give Micky a brief kiss. It wasn’t long enough, but more could wait until later. Peter and Micky looked at each other softly. The moment was ruined as Davy and Mike’s geese crashed into each other with very loud squawks.

A quick glance around the room confirmed what Peter had suspected. Micky’s goose had vanished, leaving only the two geese that were picking themselves up off the ground and giving their feathers a shake.

Peter took advantage of the geese being momentarily distracted to pull Davy and Mike over. Both of them looked surprised. “You and Micky?” Mike questioned.

Peter nodded. “Looks like. And if I’m right, you and Davy are my soulmates as well. Shall we test the theory?”

Mike still looked stunned, but he smiled. “Sounds good to me, Shotgun. Especially if it’ll make this goose leave me alone.” He pointed to the goose that was heading toward his ankle. Although it looked less angry than it had before.

Peter laughed, “I’d prefer that too.” And with that he pulled Mike down the couple of inches between them and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips.

As they pulled away, Peter saw that Mike’s goose had disappeared as well. Davy was doing his best to hide behind Micky as the remaining goose followed him around.

“Davy,” Peter began, only to be cut off as the Englishman reached for him.

“Finally!” Before Peter could respond, Davy had caught him up in a huge kiss.

The last goose made a very indignant noise that Peter was sure meant it would be gone by the time he looked up again. As the kiss ended, they hugged each other happily.

“Glad to be your soulmate, Peter,” Davy said.

Peter grinned broadly. Both at the words and at the way Davy always said his name. He’d always liked how Davy said “Petah,” and somehow it sounded even better knowing that the four of them were soulmates.

Mike and Micky moved closer, also hugging him. “Happy birthday, Peter.”

Peter didn’t think he had ever had a better birthday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guarantee you that they expected Peter’s soulmate to be a girl, probably one who’s a little naïve herself. They did NOT expect Peter’s soulmates to be them.
> 
> I forgot they were in the bedroom while I was writing and then had to go back and fix it so they didn’t randomly appear in the living room instead. Haha.
> 
> Micky and Peter get the first kiss because Peter figures Micky’s the most likely to go along with this plan without a bunch of explanations first.


	2. Micky's Birthday

A month later when Micky’s birthday rolled around, there was hope that there wouldn’t be any geese at all. Peter’s goose had made it quite clear to them that they were all soulmates. Maybe that would be enough to avoid any other geese.

Over the past several weeks, the four of them had figured out a lot about their new relationship and being soulmates. It was nice being in a relationship that was much the same as their friendship, but involved much more kissing.

This time, none of them were out of bed yet when the geese showed up. They weren’t even awake yet.

Peter waved his hand dismissively at whatever was shaking his shoulder. “Micky, I know you want your presents, but let the rest of us sleep huh?”

“Knock it off, Micky,” Mike said into his pillow. “It’s too early.”

Davy rolled over and opened his eyes, “Come on, Mick…Oh.” A goose stared down at him. Davy would swear later that its expression said, “Oh good, you’re awake, now start running.”

And running was exactly what he did. Joined by Mike and Peter, who had noticed their own geese glaring at them.

“Micky, would you please wake up and kiss us already?” asked Peter.

Micky rolled over, but didn’t wake up. Apparently unaware of the geese chasing his boyfriends around the bedroom.

“MICKY!”

“What?” Micky grumbled. “Can’t a guy sleep in on his birthday?”

“Not when his soulmate geese are here.” Mike tossed the pillow he had been fending off a goose with at Micky. “Get out of bed and rescue us!”

“Well, when you put it like that…” Micky began to get out of bed, only to be knocked off balance and land back on the bed as Davy tackled him.

“Wha…?” Micky’s question was cut off as Davy kissed him. Probably harder than he intended to. “Now you can get up,” Davy teased as he rolled off of him. “Thanks for getting rid of my goose.”

“We _will_ be continuing this later.” Micky told him as he moved toward Peter.

“I plan on it.” Davy winked at Micky before turning his attention to making sure he wasn’t injured.

Peter’s goose stopped as Micky and Peter reached for each other and just watched. Micky pulled Peter into a gentle embrace and kissed him softly. The goose had vanished by the time they looked up.

“I was going to kiss you first,” Micky told Peter. “Sort of returning the favor. But Davy had other ideas.”

“Love you too, Mick,” Davy said. He was sitting on his bed watching the scene in front of him.

“Could you please flirt with each other _later_?” Mike yelled as he tried to fend off his goose with another pillow.

“Hey!” Peter said. “Use your own pillow, Michael!”

“That was mine he threw at Micky,” Davy added. Pointing to his pillow on Micky’s blanket and Mike’s pillow still in place.

“Boy, I don’t know if you deserve a kiss.” Micky pretended to think about it.

“I’ll show you ‘_deserve_’!”

The goose’s beak made contact with the pillow.

“Kiss him quick before my pillow gets ruined,” Peter said.

Micky laughed, but went over to Mike.

“This is for Peter’s pillow, not you.”

Mike snorted. “Yeah right…”

Whatever else he might have been about to say was lost as Micky kissed him. Micky wrapped his arms around Mike and made it clear that this kiss was absolutely for him.

“Love you.” Micky said as he pulled away.

“Love you too.”

Micky grinned cheekily. “_Now_ do I get my presents?”

“What? Our love isn’t enough of a present?” Peter teased, holding a present behind his back. “Somebody’s greedy.”

“Gosh,” said Davy, putting on a look of wide-eyed innocence. “I didn’t know you wanted _presents_, Micky.”

“Is that what he said?” Mike tried and failed to look serious. “I thought Micky said he was requesting our presence.”

“Okay. But I’m taking this to mean that I don’t have to get you guys anything for your next birthdays. Or Christmas.”

Micky laughed as the other three quickly handed him his birthday presents. “You guys are the best.”

“We know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really did have every intention of having Micky kiss Peter first on his birthday. But Davy just kind of happened.
> 
> Davy’s a little aggressive with his kissing isn’t he? Fortunately, Micky doesn’t mind. Neither do Mike or Peter.
> 
> They’re all such brats to each other, but in a sweet way.)


	3. Mike and Davy's Birthday

It was late December, nearly eleven months since the first geese had shown up and the Monkees’ relationship had begun. Davy and Mike’s birthday was quickly approaching, and none of them were looking forward to it. At least this would hopefully be the last time geese would show up. But it was very likely that there would be six geese rather than three.

“Hey, fellas. I have an idea to make this as painless as possible,” Davy said.

“Anything to prevent goose attacks,” Micky said. “Peter and I will probably have two geese each. Why’d you two have to share a birthday anyway?”

“Just bad luck I guess,” Peter said.

“I hope your idea is better than Peter’s idea that we go to Australia,” Mike said. “The geese are there too you know, Pete.”

“I was joking anyway,” Peter told him. “Go ahead, Davy.”

“The geese keep showing up in the morning, right? We push the beds together and don’t get up until after the geese arrive. That way we’ll be next to each other already so it shouldn’t take too long for us all to kiss.”

“And then the geese will leave us alone!” Micky added excitedly.

The morning of Mike and Davy’s birthday, the four Monkees woke up in their own time. The geese did not arrive early to wake them up as they had on Micky’s birthday. Nor did they arrive within a few minutes as they had on Peter’s birthday. The four Monkees huddled together under the blankets and waited. Several hours passed with still no sign of the geese.

“Why don’t we get out of bed?” Mike suggested. “We can still stay close together, but I don’t think hiding under the blankets is going to do us a lot of good.”

Micky agreed. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’m hungry.”

Davy and Peter couldn’t think of any reason not to get up either, so the four Monkees dressed and headed downstairs. Sticking close to each other the way they always did when they thought something might jump out at them.

They made it through presents, two rounds of singing Happy Birthday, breakfast, and several games of cards. They were starting to think about making lunch by the time they figured that if Davy and Mike’s geese weren’t here yet, they weren’t coming.

“Well.” Davy stood up and stretched. “If there aren’t going to be any geese, I’m going to go for a walk on the beach.”

“I better go water my garden,” Peter said, starting in the direction of the side door.

Mike headed for the stairs. “I’d like to finish the book I was reading.”

Micky walked into the kitchen. “I’ll get started on lunch.”

The other three stopped and looked back at him with worried expressions.

“Guys, I’m just going to make sandwiches.” Micky assured them, annoyed by their concern. “Even _I_ can handle that.”

Agreeing that Micky probably wouldn’t mess sandwiches up too badly, the other three Monkees headed off in different directions.

That was a mistake.

A few minutes later Micky turned around from the cupboard to find two geese behind him. Peter found two more geese standing nearly in his rose bushes. A fifth goose stood on the bed looking at Mike. And a sixth goose chased Davy back up the beach.

Micky hardly had time to set down the plates he was holding before the geese went for him. Peter dashed in the door followed by his geese.

“Is Mike still…” The bedroom door slammed. “Upstairs.” Peter finished as Mike leapt over the railing trying to get a head start over his goose.

Landing right in front of Micky, Mike wasted no time in pulling him in for a kiss. One of Micky’s geese vanished.

As Micky pulled away, Peter turned Mike to face him and leaned in for his own kiss. Another goose vanished.

“Where’s Davy?” Mike asked, quickly moving his hand out of the reach of a goose.

Peter shrugged. “Still on the beach I guess.”

“How can he still be on the beach?” Micky asked. “Our geese are here.”

“Well,” Mike said, straightening his hat. “Let’s go find him.”

The three headed out toward the beach, closely followed by their geese.

Partway down the beach, their geese suddenly changed directions and chased them back the way they had come. As they entered the pad, the geese turned around again, facing out towards the beach.

“Now what?” Peter asked.

“Let’s just stay put,” Micky said. “The geese are supposed to lead people to each other. We probably just keep missing him. He’ll be back.”

Mike and Peter nodded.

“We’ll just wait for him, okay? Peter told the three geese. “Just be calm.”

To everyone’s surprise, the geese actually listened. Even sitting down on the floor to wait.

Meanwhile, Davy was also being lead on a wild goose chase. No pun intended. Or maybe he did intend it. He wasn’t sure anymore. All he knew was that he had to find the other Monkees soon so he could get rid of this goose. And theirs too.

By the time he got back to the pad he was a little out of breath. The goose that was chasing him had not been interested in slowing down and letting him walk. But as they drew near the pad, it began to calm down and allowed him to catch his breath.

Peter met Davy at the door. “You okay?” He asked, voice full of concern.

“Yeah. Especially once we get rid of these geese.” Davy reassured Peter, reaching out to kiss him gently.

Davy’s goose joined Micky and Mike’s remaining geese on the floor as Peter’s vanished. Stepping carefully around the geese, Micky made his way over to Davy.

“Peter’s a genius,” Micky told Davy. “Who knew you could reason with geese?”

“Maybe they were just tired from chasing us everywhere,” Davy suggested.

“That’s possible too,” Micky allowed, taking Davy’s face in his hands.

“Either way, you’re still a genius, Pete,” Mike said as Micky and Davy shared a soft kiss.

Peter leaned over to kiss Mike on the cheek. “Aww, you’re sweet.”

“So are y…Look out, guys.” Mike interrupted himself as the remaining two geese got up off the floor and headed towards Davy and Micky.

The younger two Monkees reluctantly pulled away from each other. Trying to avoid the geese that were heading quickly towards them. Micky, correctly guessing that Davy and Mike’s geese would ignore him, merely stepped out of the way. Davy leapt onto the nearest chair and beckoned Mike over to him.

Amused, Mike joined Davy and embraced him. The chair added enough height that Davy had to lean down slightly to kiss Mike. Micky and Peter watched, leaning comfortably against each other, as the last two geese vanished. Davy and Mike didn’t look up. Much more inclined to continue their kiss than to pay any attention to things that weren’t there anymore.

Finally they pulled away. Peter and Micky came over and the two were pulled into a hug by their boyfriends.

“Was it really necessary for you to stand on a chair?” Mike asked Davy, trying not to laugh.

“Absolutely.” Davy nodded emphatically. “They can’t reach me if I’m on a chair.”

Mike chuckled, “Oh. I thought you just needed the extra height to be able to kiss me.”

Davy poked him in the chest. “Hush you.” Then he smiled. “It’s your year to pick what we do for our birthday. What do you want to do?”

Mike grinned. “Same thing I want to do every year. Spend time with my soulmates.”

Davy squeezed his hand. “That’s what I want to do too.”

The four Monkees shared another hug. Goose attacks were a pain, but maybe it was worth it for the knowledge that they were meant to be together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mike and Davy got the middle when they all shared a bed so they could reach everyone better for kisses. But the geese had to make things difficult.
> 
> Davy’s not disputing that Peter was smart to try talking to the geese, he just disagrees on why they listened.
> 
> Davy is more than a little afraid of those geese. Poor Davy.
> 
> I figure since Davy and Mike have the same birthday that they take turns on who gets to pick the activity on their actual birthday, the other gets to pick for the next weekend. Since Davy likes parties and Mike’s not big on them, Mike always picks something for just the four of them to do and Davy plans a party.
> 
> I tried to get good moments of each individual pair into this story. I hope I succeeded.
> 
> This fic was really fun to write. Normally I write goose fics for Sesame Street where the geese are sarcastic, but not mean. I had a blast writing about geese chasing the poor Monkees all over creation.
> 
> My friend: I picture Monkees goose fic with the Benny Hill Theme playing.  
Me: It is EXACTLY that.


End file.
